Lost Heart Lost Soul

My next door neighbor passed away on Sunday. He had been sick for a couple of years but we thought he had the cancer beat. Then he got sick again and one thing led to another and it ended on last Sunday morning with an ambulance removing his lifeless body from his home that he inhabited for 28 years.

When we decided to relocate in this side of the Ohio River, a stones throw from Louisville and Kentucky where all my family and my husbands family lives. We had been living in upstate Indiana, in snow country, and though it easier to stay here due to taxes and other thinfs that don't matter much now.

What does matter is how lucky we were in choosing this house and this neighborhood and our neighbors who came along with it. Not only Joe next door, who is the best neighbor anyone could ask for, but Ed across the street also falls into that category.

Ed passed away in December after a short illness. A shock to everyone. Ed was 55.

What made Ed and Joe so irreplaceable is that we have never had such fun neighbors ever! Except maybe when we were kids in our Baby Boomer subdivision, but certainly not before. The highlight of the early spring Tuesday night until the first frost and inclement weather took hold was a shindig, much like Hank Hill Gang sipping beers in the back alley. Only they did it in Eds open garage that was also his office and his position to spy on the neighborhood.

Now spying on the neighborhood is a good thing. Thought Ed was facing the computer screen while he conducted business and watched TV in between transactions with a beer in his hand (his Internet handle No Worries Bring Beer). It was rumored that Ed had eyes in the back of his head. With his superhuman powers Ed kept track of the coming and going of the entire block. Runing the stop sign was a pet peeve of his and he was able to persuade the police in the town to take a better interest in the crimes.

But Hank Hill night was the  best. The men and at times some of the woman, would congregate at the always open garage door (unless it was after midnight and before 7am) and hash out the worlds problems, politics, sports, and of course the "old stories" of bravery, never seen before feats of strength, and the winning touchdown, home run or desperation shot that won the game! 

Joe was the soul who helped keep an eye on our house when we were gone. He helped trim the side walk when I did not even know what a hedger was (still don't) and was a comfort always with a smile a wave and a kind word.

We would bring him cigars from the Ybor City area of Tampa when the displaced Cubans still hand rolled tobacco into delectable and desirable smokes for the willing. He offered to pay. We would never hear of such a thing. He was our guardian angel.

Now he is gone, Ed is gone and the neighborhood is not ever going to be the same. The heart and soul is gone.

JC's Big Adventure

Sometimes not knowing where to begin means you just jump right in. I have somehow fallen victim to a sedentary lifestyle. My biggest hobby being reading. I have gained about 20 pounds since leaving Florida. My blood pressure is high for me!! Who always had perfect blood pressure. So I have to change my habits. I need to eat better and get some exercise besides gardening. And walking dogs,.

A change up. To do something different. I joined Planet Fitness and have gone a few times, and if I don't go today. It will be two weeks. Life style change is hard.

So, I thought it would be nice to go the the scenic loop at Cherokee Park, about a 20 minute drive. Also JC could take his bike and go around the loop while I walk it. True to its name, the trail is a loop that has traffic going only one way so that walkers, runners, dog walkers, baby buggy pushers, and bikers can have the inside lane. I am uncertain regarding the length of the lop, but I would estimate it to be 2 and maybe a half miles. It begins from where we parked as a descent towards the Daniel Boone statue and then a left traversing the cliffs that make the perimeter of the park. Then a gradual ascent up to Hogan's Fountain Pavilion with the Fountain being a naked Pan playing his fife and filling the fountain with his pee. It's adorable.

Then down the hill and a hairpin curve and once again you have a cliff covered with trees and bushes and wild flowers on your right as you go down down down and then some to open fields and another turn to the left that has another fountain, this one built into a spring wall with a lions face that spits out into a stone trough and then back into the ground. I believe this is Beargrass Creek area. Over two stone bridges and up another hill with the golf course on your right and another turn to the right with the park on top of the hill with the children s playground equipment and a pavilion to your left for walkers, bikers, buggie pushers to rest and get out of the sun. And there is our car waiting for our return.

I told him I would sit on the bench that was on the other side of the sidewalk next to our car. I'm going to estimate it took me 45 minutes to walk the loop. I sat on the bench and waited for him slightly concerned he had not passed me. I thought with the time it took me, he would be able to go around three of four times depending on his ability to make it up those steep hills.

My last words to him were, keep the walkers and runners, bikers, buggy walkers in sight and you will be okay. I should have directed him inside the yellow line and told him to keep to the left always.

He obviously took off to the right and headed towards the Daniel Boone statue and from there I have no idea.

I waited for as long a s I could without panicking. Then I panicked and called my sister in lawa for advice. She send me her husband, my brother. I went around the scenic loop in the car three times and went on all the off shoot roads he could have possible have taken and there was no sightings of him. I began to go outside the loop and headed down Willow Park road the abutted to Cherokee Rd when My brother called.

we met at Hogan;s Fountain and did another loop together and then headed to the police station,.

I was hesitant to call 911 and put out a silver alert. My mind was in a flux about sharing with my family that JC as diagnosed with mild dementia but there could not have  been a better time.

While giving the description of what JC was wearing the last time I saw him, (I got it right!! I have to be more cognizant of everything going forward) my phone rang and it was him. He had made it to my sisters house and we headed to pick him up and hear what happened.

He was "lost" for 2 1/2 hours. He went in and out of streets in the highlands until coming upon Mid City Mall which he recognized and got his bearings enough to walk the bike to my sisters house and call.

I'm being generous when I say my sisters house because he was actually several doors down but the gentleman he ran into (cutting lawns doing lawn service whom my sister was a customer) was gracious enough to lend JC a phone and direct himto the house.

All is well that ends well and this was certainly a learning experience for me.

Number one, never let him go off without a phone.

Number two, I need documentation the he has mild dementia before the Police  can do anything. Yet, they were taking the information to send out some cruisers to take a look see for him.

I definitely have a life style change ahead of me.

THE DOCTOR WILL SEE YOU NOW

Nice office. Nice staff. The doctor was absolutely wonderful. When was the last time a  docotr, not a PA, not a NP, but a real live doctor spent 45 minutes with you? Never unless you were under the knife.

It was as I thought it was going to be. Mild dementia, early onset Alzheimer's.  How fast will it progress? How to slow it down along side the drugs? I suppose questions I have will be addressed on the next appointment. Just knowing now makes it more doable. I suppose. At least the issue is addressed and treatment is started.

The gave him a series of tests to determine the severity of the dementia. "What is 100 take away 7?" Joe got it right several times. several times not. Did not know what year it was, what the date was, did know it was Wednesday, did know Trump was president but could not remember the VP was Mike Pence. Could not remember the county we lived in. Knew we lived in Jeffersonville. Did not remember what city we were in (New Albany) knew it was on Charlestown Rd.

When asked to draw a clock with the time being 1:30 he could not do it. Took three tries to draw a clock face with the numbers but without the arms and 1:30 marked to the right of the one. The doctor held it up to show me. I wanted to laugh. JC is watch crazy! He owns about 10 of them!

The brain CT showed just normal shrinkage typical with age.

Begin medicine and come back in a month . More blood work.

HELLO AGAIN

So, this is the way it's going to be? Grey hair, sore shoulder, one blind eye, very tender foot, can't drive at night, worries about health care, worried about my husband having early onset Alzheimer's? The list of concerns is endless. The children (grown adults now), debt, yard care, gnats (dreaded fruit flies) taking over the kitchen, cat with diabetes, beloved dog has knot on top of head, (what the hell is it?), can't travel because of three dogs and the cat . Like I said endless.

Tomorrow we go to the neurologist and begin a battery of  tests to find out why. Maybe he can look at the CT scan and deduce from that what is going on. I'm selfish. I am concerned with what it's going to mean to me. I'm the one most everything falls on. I'm the rudder, I am the captain, I am the sailes, I am everything to keep this ship afloat. When my Mother was dying I was given some wonderful drugs that did not make me sleepy, did not do anything other than make me feel better.

I need them again. I need something to offset the anxiety and the stress.

My bestie has suggested writing. And so, maybe. Can't hurt. The computer is halfway working. Slow but reliable.