Motivate Me! Somebody Please!!

What is the secret to keeping motivated even when your mildly successful but somedays you just can't seem to find the energy and the passion to keep on going. It's not like I don't need the money. Having a household with two young adults who do not work but need a roof over their head, cat food and liter for their felines, food in their bellies, cigarettes to fill their lungs, electricity to keep them cool in the summer and warm in the winter, to pay their bail, their fines, their lawyers,  to have insurance on the vehicle that they borrow to drive, keep gas in the tank for them to go places, and all the other hundreds of necessary items to keep them living the good life without lifting a finger....takes extra money.

My death pile is out of control and I have hundreds of items that are "uncashed checks". But, I sit here in my pjs at 8am and feel uninspired. Maybe I feel a trifle defeated and hopeless. I wish I had a magic wand to kick start me into action. I did have such a person in my life. Someone I longed to please and be my best and shine for him. He left me over two years ago and life has, will not ever be the same. I know he looks down from heaven, the other side, and sees what I am dealing with. I feel his presence. But, but, but....

He was my biggest cheerleader, besides my parents. I miss that, I need someone to tell me YOU CAN DO IT. I have confidence in you. You're the smartest woman I have ever known. Do you know how much I live you?

Do you know how much I miss you?

My Mom always said in times of trouble and grief, in times of pain "offer it up to God". 

Vintage Pearls

My  One Dollar Pearls.

 

Frustration

 Sometimes things don't go the way you think they should go. Sometimes the atmosphere is entirely different, the people have too much money, and the items are top quality. If that is the situation, be prepared to have your bids shot down and be shut out, totally shut out of the auction. Never have I left an auction empty handed. Always a first time I suppose, and Saturday was the day, 

I swore as I stomped out, as I huffed out after dropping out of bidding for a convex antique oval framed picture of a child. I do not have an antique shop where the clientele is adapted to paying big bucks for a valuable item. I sell on line and in a humble peddler mall on the wrong side of town. No way was I going to bid over 50$ for the picture/photograph and make my margins. I folded and left the auction in a somewhat sour and agitated mood.

Only a Bloody Mary calmed me down as I met up with an old friend from grammar school at the local hot spot. Now I was out of my general area of sourcing. I actually was back in my home town,one of the richest counties in the state, if not the richest per capita. Every time I attend of the auctions in my home town I am blown away on the bidding that builds and builds until I am squeezed out. I am so use to the average Joe type of auction, box lots going for 1$. bidder pick for 5$ I will leave with a car load of items spending under 200$, but mostly spending around 100$ and selling an item or two and making my money back and in the profit area after a few days.

This is totally different. Do these items sit in an antique booth waiting for that one special person to stumble upon the picture? Or do these buyers have someone in  mind, a sure thing, a slam dunk waiting for them?

A lot of costume jewelry, a tray of nice but nothing spectacular that would have gone for maybe at the most 45$  at My Favorite Auction House not defunt. The lot went for 400$ at Rich People Auction. A lot of 5 faux pearls, nice pearls but faux, five pieces - 200$ 

I had a hard time going to sleep that night because I mouthed the words "f*** Him" at the auctioneer after the relentless up bidding of the guy determined to get the photo. I felt ashamed that I lost my temper. And I actually prayed for forgiveness and the need for tolerance. To not be an idiot and to be better from then on out. And to never go to an auction there again. Unless I have won the lottery.

And the next day I went to two 75% off estate sales and really cleaned up. There was a basket of costume jewelry in the kitchen in baggies marked 2$ to 8$ at 75% off. I went thru and pulled about 15 bags, mostly the faux pearls. When I got home and began sorting the jewelry, pulling the Monet, Napier and Liz Claiborne, I ran across a dulled set of pearls and the clasp marked "Silver". I suppose God granted my confession and handed over a vintage strand of Akoya pearls. For one dollar.

But, never will I go to that auction house again.